I hate when someone tries to give me "dap" it's really awkward, what do i do in this situation?

A friend of mine recently went through a similar situation, and was able to adapt by just doing a simpler greeting consisting of the basics of the variety of daps that were being done. The key was being confident, and initiating the greeting. As for Ebonics, an intellectual study will not suffice, but if you are around enough people, eventually it will become easier to understand. Again, this was just the account of a friend, and professional sociologists might have better advice.